Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize