Kiss
Puke
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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