Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
