the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
