It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
