My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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