She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
