In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize
