dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
