You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Randomize
