How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
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