i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
vagina is talking i cant
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
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