yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
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