TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
