somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize