Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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