I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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