So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize