I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
