All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize