Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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