so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
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