Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
is it fun? or sober?
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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