i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Randomize
