So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
I think I am morally bankrupt
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
This toilet bowl is my home.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
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