I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
We talked him into tasing himself.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
