I love black thongs
PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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