Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I just want nice things and good sex
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
