so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
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