You're so nebulous sometimes
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Randomize
