he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
