i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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