I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
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