She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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