My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
