i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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