too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
