Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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