when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
I understand Curling. That high.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Randomize
