you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
