i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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