are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
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