I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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