walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize
