so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
my poor anus
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize