At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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