In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
Randomize
