she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
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