"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Randomize
