You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
