We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
