Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Randomize
