Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
