Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize