Already got asked if we're dating
Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
her facebook's as public as her vagina
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
did i walk over a car last night?
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Randomize